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Cultivating meta-self-control: 3 ways to make willpower unnecessary
What if self-control was a skill you could cultivate? Here are three strategies copied from the best and backed by science.
If you’ve read psychology-related non-fiction, you’ve probably heard of the marshmallow experiments from the 1970s: Researchers put marshmallows in front of small children and observed how long they could delay gratification. If the child waited until the experimenter returned to the room, they got to eat the marshmallow; if they summoned the researcher earlier, they got a less preferred treat like a pretzel.¹
A decade later, the researchers followed up on these subjects. They found that the children who’d waited the longest were viewed as more academically and socially competent by their teachers and family members and were getting higher SAT scores.² ³
So being able to delay gratification is an ability which you form early on in life and which determines your future success? That’s how the story is often told. But it could also be told differently.
Originally, the researchers didn’t set out to uncover some psychological trait you either have or you don’t. They wanted to understand what makes someone more likely to delay gratification successfully.
After experimenting with various test set-ups (e.g., covering the marshmallow with a cake tin or giving the children toys to play with), the…